Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Old dicks, new tricks

Gosh, how I love creative weekends... And by creative I mean spending time with my girlfriends. This time it was the seaside. Although there was a lot of sleeping (just plain sleeping - the old-fashioned way, no bed hopping or anything promiscuous), some intriguing conversations were involved. Among us mostly, but that doesn't mean there's nothing new to add or, better yet, learn.

I always thought male equipment is divided to short, long, circumcised, uncircumcised, too big for hand-grab, too small for hand-grab and just right for hand-grab. Well, it came to my knowledge that there is much more behind this simple math that I've been living by for many many years.
Just to mention few, let me start with the worst kind. Cone-shaped dick. Apparently I can be extremely happy not to have encountered one on my journey of penis stories. According to my secret information source (perhaps penis moles?) cone-shaped dicks are a punishment for women. Physically and mentally (the latter because it takes much pretending to enjoy the activity). After first closer confrontation with the monster there is only one thing to do. And one thing only. To avoid the second rendezvous. My friend simply didn't answer the phone. For many times. It seems that the cone-shaped dick licked... ups, liked her, though.

Momentarily, mushroom season is off the topic, however, there's a certain type of mushrooms we need to mention. Again, I have no idea, what were they talking about, nonetheless, my penis moles didn't really approve mushroom type of penis. The head is oversized for the rest of it, so after first exciting seconds, inevitable disappointment follows. Waiting for something to happen... no. No proper action whatsoever.

Have you heard of a perfect penis? My friend's new boyfriend is in possession of a sample, as reported by the lady in question. Why do I know that? Simply because she is yapping about it constantly. When I hear the phrase Have I told you about his perfect dick? the hair on my neck stand up. Yes, she repeated it so many times that even grandmothers on the bus have heard the rumor, probably. Nevertheless, such jewels evidently exist. And girls love them. Boy, do they love them.

And now, last but not least, circumcised ones, or cabriolet, as we like to call them. I think I don't stand alone, if I name the group interesting. Geographically they are pretty rare in our European area, but I would give them thumbs up. Other ladies who have tested that kind of an instrument would more or less agree on the matter.

So, what's your favorite shape? Something to think and dream about...


P.S. Watch this trailer.


  1. In your current topic I recomend this movie

  2. you have to see the whole movie...if not for the fact that movie is good...for the research purpuses :)