We all have heard or even done the two men/women relationship. The parties involved don't know about each other, perhaps you tell a friend or, better yet, wait until it's all over, before you spill it out. Guilty as charged. It's a classic case of bigamy. Old as the human race itself (or at least as old as the invention of airplanes - bigamy always reminds me of pilots. Dunno why).
Lately, however, I've begun to notice a new dating sensation: bigamous monogamy. Confused? Well, allow me to explain...
One of my friends has had a boyfriend for years. That is, years, if you don't count all the break-ups in between that could occur even on weekly basis. It was by far the strangest relationship I have ever seen with a certain pattern. It nearly had a life of its own. Sometimes, when these pauses lasted for a longer period, the friend was partying wildly and as a consequence she made a lot of new acquaintances. In time, one special acquaintance resulted in a new found new boyfriend. So far, everything is going according to the standard track, however, make no mistake - she kept returning to her previous man all the time. The second player stood somewhere in the middle, hopping in and out of her life coordinated to her relationship with the first player.
The most amazing thing in this alterationship (alternative relationship) is the awareness. The second knew about the first all the time, the first learned about the second in time and she... She was conducting this orchestra as if this was the most normal thing to do. How inspiring.
Just to make things clear, let me repeat. When she broke up with the first, she was dating the second, and when the things with the first cooled down, she switched back to him and turned off the second. I hope it is self-evident than none of the boys were aloud to have other women. When they did (this is self-evident, too, I hope), she put on a crazy woman attitude, screamed, dramatized, cried, fought and swapped between them constantly.
This codependent, coexisting bigamous monogamy is lasting for years now. Nothing has changed, apart from their age. Maturity is still in question, to be honest, for all people involved.
If it were up to me, I'd chosen the second one. It would take years to explain why, so I guess, you'll just have to trust me on this one.